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Burn Out

I love my job. I love my job so much that I want to be the best at what I do. There should be no excuses not to work hard. I have superiors who mentor me, and I took each day as a learning opportunity. I cherish every moment with my mentors especially when they impart the skills and knowledge they refined throughout the years. I wanted to be a sponge and absorb the wisdom that they shared with me.

I love my website. is a vision I received from God. Through God’s empowerment, it became a reality. It is still at its early stage, but it is making progress. I enjoy writing articles, doing website marketing, and sharing the goodness of Jesus.

But there’s something terribly wrong.

I noticed my behaviour towards my family one night. I was not able to put my baby to sleep and I didn’t have a good night conversation with my wife. I prioritised my work and my website over my relationship with my wife and kids.

I didn’t even learn my lesson right then and there. I continued to focus on work and the website. I didn’t realise that I pushed my body and mind to the limits. I started making mistakes. I was exhausted. I didn’t know what to do.

I failed a lot. The fear of failing took over me because I couldn’t accept that my best effort will result in failure. I sought comfort from friends but didn’t get any. I even felt rejected. I should have known better, but I decided to reach out to God as the last option.

When my rest day came, I fasted. I didn’t eat solid food and just drank water. I read the Bible, prayed, and watched videos of Levi Lusko. I slept. I didn’t eat but I felt refreshed. I spent quality time with my baby and my eldest son. I also had a good conversation with my wife when she came home from work.

I connected to God that day and God told me to let go. Let go of the burden that I carried. He reminded me that He is in control. He made me realise that I made imaginary standards and responsibilities for myself. My ministry was never about me. Heck, my life is not about me! It was not my hands that provided me with the opportunities and the benefits I’m enjoying right now. Everything I have was given! Given by God who loves me unconditionally even with all my mistakes and failures.

Matthew 11:28-30

New International Version (NIV)

28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Thank you for reading this devotional story and I pray that it encouraged and empowered you in your walk with Christ. Please read other devotional stories on the website. You might find Cry, Failed! and Fear is an Illusion interesting.

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